TO: Cleo Jones
FROM: Elijah Abrams
SUBJECT: Happy Holidays WTF

I woke up with a mild hangover and an alarm notification that said, “Check attachment in email Cleo sent to herself from my phone, Dummy.”
Your video proof of me offering you a temporary assistant job over the holidays seems legit.
The payment amount I agreed to was outrageous. However, I have a deadline to meet. Having already fired seven temps this week, I am inclined to give this a shot, assuming you are willing to start today.
Please don’t wear that saucy elf costume, speak in rhyme, or act all festive.
P.S. I apologize for the confusion caused by my son’s good intentions. He knew nothing of our former acquaintance and film school rivalry. But thanks for playing along.

TO: Elijah Abrams
FROM: Cleo Jones
SUBJECT: And a very merry good morning to you, sir!

To your non-festive requests, I must say nay!
You can pay me in cash, starting today.
I’ll help you produce movie magic, while spreading Christmas cheer,
Despite your mockery of my theatrical career.
I’ll bring my balloons and my kazoo.
I hope your son can join us too!
So flattered you found my elf costume saucy!
See you at the office, Bossy…